HSN like I've never seen before...

I'm sure all of you have seen the Home Shopping Network on TV. That show that you probably will never buy anything from, but you always catch yourself watching for at least a good 5 minutes of. With the sweet old ladies selling clothes, jewelry, make-up, home gadgets, and almost anything you can think of. Actually....I'm just going to take the word "almost" out of that last sentence. ANYTHING you could imagine buying, they have a show on TV to sell it.

Last night I got into bed and decided to watch a little bit of TV before I fell asleep. It was probably about 10:00pm. I'm searching through the guide, and nothing much is on....but something catches my eye. A show called "Erotic Goodies" on a home shopping channel. So I'm like Huh?? What the heck is that?? I turn to the channel. It's a freaking Kink version of HSN. I don't think it was actually HSN but the whole,

"Yes you can buy this for only 3 easy payments of $19.95!"
"You must hurry because supplies are going fast!"
"If you buy today, shipping and handling is FREE!"

Sweet ladies talking about these wonderful products that they have on show for today that come with all of these wonderful features. But instead of talking about a toaster, they are talking about a dildo.

Instead of,

"Look at how wide these slots are, perfect for bagels! And this nifty little dial that lets you choose the amount of crispiness you'd like! It comes in an assortment of colors to match your kitchen!"

its,

"Look how big and long these are! And this nifty little dial that lets you choose the amount of vibration! It comes in an assortment of colors to fit your preference!"

WOW. Just WOW. What is this world coming to??!?

When my kids are older, I am DEFINITELY never going to let them watch TV past like 2:00pm. And if they ask for a TV in their room?? "Yeah sure, when you turn 18. Oh What? All your friends get to have a TV in their room? Yeah well all your friends are going to grow up to be porn stars!" GEEZ!! I am officially afraid for my kid's future. PLEASE God, let them grow up to be normal. Maybe become a priest or a nun?? That would be GREAT. Thank you God. Amen!